This time of the year...

What is this time of the year at SGO like for me? 
Well, as Gandalf says to Pippin - "It's the deep breath before the plunge..." 
Yes, Maturita oral exams are on the doorstep, but now is the lull...the waiting...and I've never really been good at waiting ;-)
This is the time of the year when most of my lessons have finished - yes - I have lost 10 hours a week since Last Bells came & went... But here at SGO, with 'freedom' comes 'unpredictability'. The regularity (which I get used to, and which I like) has now gone - and what looks like some free time to prepare for Maturita exams can suddenly be taken up with some 'suplovani' :-) But I'm not complaining about meeting new, and often younger, students...it's just that you can't really 'plan' for it - so I improvise a lot. 
But I also miss my classes - I have known most of the students for two years & over that time I have built up some rapport with them. But now it's gone...
On top of this, there is the new building. Almost from dawn till dusk (meaning the beginning and end of work ;-) ) - there is a monotonous drilling (which reaches into the deepest part of your brain, lodges there, and sort of numbs it...), banging & other sundry noises. I guess our 'kabinet' is not so well situated after all :-)
And the sun is shining! This is great news...but not when you're in an office for most of the day. I much prefer to teach...or examine ;-)
So...roll on next week, and let the games commence!!

OK...you try correcting this ;-)

I quite often get some essays which are outstanding in both their content & quality - however, once in a while, I get something like this...although it has to be said, this is quite extreme.

I will not reveal the student's identity - but even though it was full of mistakes...it made me laugh - really out loud! I'm sure by the time you get to the end, you'll understand why... ;-)

Here is the essay, as I received it:

"I love food. Every day, i have got a breakfast. During the week-end, I eat a pastry with hemenex. For lunch, I prefere a meet with potatos and for dinner, i prefer a vegetables.

I have got the most favorite three foods. I like a chicken with cheese and peach. My sekond favorite food is pizza. I like i pizza Hawai. It's a pizza with annas. My third favorite food is duck with cabbage. My mum cuck a duck durning Chritmas feasts. I hate a mashrooms and a tomato. My favorite word cuisine is French cuisne. I really like a cheeses. In French, there are a lot of types cheeses and in French, there is excellent creeps šitin chocolate. This is very good."

After such an experience...I can only refer to the Master...Stanislav...over to you ;-)

FUNNY ANSWERS TO TESTS Jan/Feb 2013

Well, it's been a long time coming, but finally (thanks to a couple of quieter days because of entrance exams), I have been able to compile a collection of the more amusing, even surreal answers, to some of the Tests that were given by me to 3rd/4th year classes back in Jan/Feb 2013. Hope you enjoy them!

Mr E

FUNNY ANSWERS TO TESTS Jan 2013

5 Current threats to the environment -

Oxid rain?

Unforestation

Czech politicians – they are a threat to everything except their wallets!

Exhausted/exhausting fumes

We have four period of year – spring, summer, autumn, winter.

Bungalow -

It's a house which you have when you are tired of city life and you want some peace

Bungalow is a house without floor

It's a house on the water

Detached House -

It is a house which has two front doors

Terraced House -

It's a house which neighbours look the same.

It's a house with a terrace

A type of house where is more stairs

It's a big house which it have many front door

Bedsitter -

I put a glass of water on my bedsitter

It's a type of flat, but bigger

It's a house which stay in suburbs, not in town

Small table next to the bed

A type of caravan where it is possible to live...

Somebody who sets the bed

A woman or man who looks after your child when you need someone to do it.

Someone who is a couch potato, you are bedsitter who do nothing.

It is something like a sofa.

It's the main room in our house, flat – we can watch the TV there or spend time with the family.

It's a peace of furniture where people usually stock some smaller clothes, blankets, etc.

Hamlet -

A local theatre is situated in the hamlet of this village

Masterpiece – author, William Shakespeare – theatre play :-)

I visited a theatre because they played a Hamlet. Hamlet was written by Shakespeare.

Very famous book from English authors.

It is an old building and the family live in the hamlet lot of generation.

It's a place that people living in many years ago.

The person who is interested in nature and growing.

Hamlet is some permanently inhabited house which stands alone.

It's a place around the village. Fresh air, nature. I really like our hamlet in our village.

Lodger -

It is place like balcoon (balcony?)

A person who lives in the lodge which is a small, usually wooden house, where a lot of people spend their weekends.

Landlord -

It's part of a place

Poacher -

I don't know it certainly, but is not it a wild pig or something like that?

It has some connection with a plant. Maybe it can be the upper part of some plant?

Person who hunts and kills people for meat, fur, and so on...

Thaw -

It is a part of the animal body but I don't know which one

A part of a tree

The part of an animal's body

Severe -

It is part in every bigger city, it is system of canalizations

Recipe -

That I say something nice about the product

Paper where are information, or where doctor write some kind of medicine

Paper when we have a goods what we need buy in shop

Something what tell us how to do something

Paper what you usually use to get a pain killers

On the back side of T-shirt

Something that we need when we go to the shop

Descripe, how you should anything thing

A piece of paper who I got if I buy a present

Receipt -

A paper where are advice

A piece of paper where is writing how is made of

Something what we do to know what we'll do

Some manual for cooking

Peace of paper hanging on clothes in shops showing us information about the clothes

For cookers, it says what you need to cook something

Small thing on clothes with symbols for washing, ironing and size...

Guarantee -

Something that we have, it's good for us, because we can do it easier

Prescription -

A paper which shows you how to use the thing you bought

A pre-description

Boast -

The act of making something bigger - “She had to boast her storing place, so it could accommodate all her new clothes.”

Unprecedented -

It can be unprecedented person who cannot do the right things, we shouldn't follow her in his or her ways.

Leak (context of environment) -

It should be everywhere, but in the context of the environment we probably speak about ozone leak. It is a big danger because a bad sunshine can comes here.

Nature more where is watter.

Landfill -

It's a person whose live in a flat and pay for it to landlord.

It's some part of atmosphere.

Stationer's -

You can buy toys here.

I guess that it's something like one shopes containing something of each other shops (you can buy parfumes, some biscuits, napkins) – just everything.

Greengrocer's -

In this shop you can buy some things for your garden, like some shovels, hoes, baskets, saws, or seeds and flowers.

A Stall is -

A corridor in a shop with shelves with goods

Well, I have no idea mm

A D.I.Y. Shop is -

Art shop. This shop visit young people.

Mugger -

Something like a theft, but bigger (like in a bank or house).

Explain the following terms in detail:

Living rough -

Not good life.

Thick-skinned -

Somebody have problem (like Wayne Rooney) that his hair are thin. He wants to have beautiful wavy thick-skinned hair. Like Jimi Hendrix.

Incompetent -

Someone who doesn't like competitions.

Even teachers have an off day... ;-)

Yesterday, I had to go once more to Prague (another exam for Maturita examiners...as I failed the last one! Too strict! Can you believe it?? :-))...and I enjoyed a comedy of errors on my way there...

Such a journey dictates an early start - so, up at 5.10am...getting stuff together etc...driving on my way to the station & I realise that I have forgotten my reading glasses! Oh well, I'll have to survive with my normal ones hanging off the end of my nose, I thought... Got to the station, finally found a place to park...got the 6.02am Reggio-Jet, as has become my custom on this trip - first carriage etc...sat in my seat...then the young lady asked to check my ticket...right seat, but wrong carriage. I thought I was in number 1, but it was number 5! She informed me that I had to go to the end of the train...so, I grabbed all my things together & wandered through the train, much like a homeless man, I guess. In my semi-sleepiness, I came to the end of the train & realised that it was carriage number 4! Where was number 1?? So, I wandered back, this time muttering like a mental health patient in search of someone to give me my medication (which by this time was my free coffee!)...a couple of Reggio-Jet staff, obviously disturbed at the sight of me meandering through the train, asked me if they could help me. I was informed that number 1 carriage came after number 5 :-) Wonderful! Not sure of the logic of all that...but I found my way to my carriage and to my seat...

I got there just in time for my coffee, though I didn't get it with the milk that I asked for. I made myself comfortable, stirred my sugar in, put the lid on again (or so I thought) and took a drink...nice :-) But what was that warm sensation on my shirt?! Horrors! Coffee all over my clean shirt! What a great start to the day...!

Thankfully, the rest of my trip went without incident, and I have hopefully passed my exam...and I enjoyed a trip on LEO Express coming back - no freebies there, but a bit more leg-room...and what a lovely spring day it was. Czech Republic is truly a beautiful country.

And such was my start to the day ;-)

Character

Last week, I had a shock! Now please understand, not many things shock me (when you get to my age!) - but last Monday, I was sitting at my desk marking some papers. A student (who will remain nameless) came into the office, and I could see that they were holding an essay in their hand. Quickly, in my mind, I began to wonder why this was, as I'd already had an essay from them.
They said, "This is my corrected essay. The last one I gave you, well, the first part was from the internet, but the rest was mine. However, my conscience wouldn't let me rest, and so I have corrected it. Is that ok?" Is that OK??? Wow! I was shocked! :-O

This was the first time in my (nearly) 7 years that a student had confessed to cheating BEFORE I found them out!! Usually, I have to be a detective and confront the student with their plagiarism. Usually, the student will then confess, although recently, I had a student who, even though they admitted that they copied it from the internet, insisted that it was their work because 'it was what they wanted to say'!! (If you can understand the crooked logic of that! :-))

Was it ok?? For sure it was! I happily accepted the corrected essay & disposed of the faulty original one. What the student didn't know was that I had already marked it...I'd noted that the first part was a bit 'vague' and 'general', but the rest of it was ok. I didn't totally suspect cheating, but then again, it wasn't as obvious as some previous culprits!

It struck me afterwards that it is a great joy for a teacher to discover when a student learns something more important than a 'maturita topic'...that they have learnt about character. Maybe I am teaching the right things? I certainly hope so ;-)